Cloudy
Today was a surprise birthday party for an American friend from church group (originally from Boise Idaho) who's been here a few years. He met his fiance from Kenya and they've been in Shanghai for the interim. Soon they'll both go to the states once she gets the visa. Meanwhile a bunch of us made the trek to Songjiang on the subway where he currently lives. It was a familiar trek as I used to live out there 3 years ago. Coming back was a lot more pleasant as one of my friends has a private car and driver. Even so, I sure don't miss those days of trekking out to the suburbs!
The party itself was amazing! Imagine my surprise at the surprise party when I bumped into a Chinese and German couple I had originally met in 2002. At first I didn't recognize them but they instantly recognized me. Back then the wife was pregnant with a baby but now this "baby" was a full grown 9 year old son going to a snazzy top class international school and fluent in English, Mandarin, and German.
All of a sudden it hit me I've been here 10 years, or nearly so. Of course the time has just flown by like a rocket. Not all of this was spent in China. The first three years was in Shanghai from 2001-04 teaching English at various full time and part time gigs. Then I went back to Vancouver in 2005 to upgrade my education. It wasn't long before I was back on a plane to Asia and making the big bucks in the offshore school system. 2 years in Dalian, a year in Wuhan, and another 3 years in Shanghai .... but not necessarily in that order.
When I first met that Sino-German couple, we were all fresh off the plane as it were. But somehow we reconnected and are now one of the few "lifers" in this city that has remained, despite the revolving dhoor. They now live outside of the city in another province, but with a private car, this is hardly an issue. He's not te only one. I can name a half-dozen or so more friends who have private cars and drivers. As the poor teacher, I have to suffer on motorcycles in the freezing cold or else take the damn bus.
During the car ride we got chatting as to how to deal with the constant revolving door of foreigners who come into the city, stay for a year or two, then move on. We all agreed it is difficult to make and maintain friendships and relationships in this context, yet that is exactly what the "lifers" have done, otherwise they wouldn't stay here. Then someone else made a comment that was so obvious I can't believe I didn't pick up on this earlier. The "lifers" have established relationships with the Shanghainese. They have either local spouses or long-term partners, or somehow put down roots in such a way that packing up and leaving isn't an option. As mentioned in another post, the locals are considerably more stable than the revolving door crowd, and taking the time to establish relationships with the locals is one way to stick around. An obvious fact, but overlooked.
So on that note, it's high time I hooked up with a local and got married.
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